Troubadours, II

Hey, fuck you everybody! This one's for Chumley and the Wendigos, poised to fall in dramatic, humiliating fashion, sung to the tune of Mel Tillis's great "Mental Revenge," performed here by Waylon. Here's to everyone else having 0-0 ties! GO BRONCOS! GO TROUBADOURS!

If ya wanna back up all your cannibal talk
Then here's a little meat in your face.
Don't think that because my man Brady is gone
Your team can keep up my pace.

I know you want to kiss me
But you can't, you smell like booze
Put your pants back on; all your dignity's gone
The Wendigos are going to lose.

And I will have two, two, two...two straight wins.
And I will have two, two, two...two straight wins.

[I especially like those last couple of lines. By the way, Matter's finally contacted me, so his pussy ass should field his team this week. Until next time, fuck everybody but me!]


Erik Loomis said...

Maybe it's because I know these songs, but this might be the funniest blog series I've ever read.

Also, you are probably the only person in fantasy football history to trash talk using Mel Tillis references.

Dallas Dipsomaniacs said...

"Until next time, fuck everybody but me!"

I assume John Elway is included in 'everybody', so I'll just go ahead and agree with your sentiment...

Sator Arepo said...

You're Cat Fucking Stevens over here, I tell you what.

AnthonyS said...

SA, don't you mean Mohammed something something?

(Too lazy to google after 6 hour Saturday morning faculty assembly meeting)

Murderface said...

Aww, fuck me. I totally didn't pay attention to the fact that I have 2 Ravens on my starting roster today. Fucking med school taking up all my time and energy.

Ohe well, due to Delhomme's "performance", it looks like I might pull this one out in spite of myself.

Well, if LT fucking wakes up and Joey Galloway stays old as hell anyway.

Lyrad Simool said...

You'd have won if the Broncos weren't so goddamned fantastic. GO ELI!!